The Four Agreements

The “four agreements” come from the eponymous publication by Miguel Ruiz and read:

Be impeccable with your words

Don’t take anything personal

Do not assume

Always do your best

The first time I came into contact with Ruiz and his four promises came on a trip through the US in 2015, when I drove by car from east to west coast. Interestingly enough, his books met with me on this trip three times, in three different states completely independent contexts of each other – which left a lasting impression on me.

The transformative power of the four promises is incredible. Consistently applied, they can change your life for the better. I would like to briefly describe here my personal approach to the four points and can only recommend to anyone, to deal more intensively with Miguel Ruiz, for example, also with his book “The Mastery of Love”.

1.BE IMPACCABLE WITH YOUR WORD

For me, that means first of all: just talk when it’s really necessary. And when you speak, always be honest and sincere. The lie is your biggest enemy. You’ll quickly realize that most people talk a lot and hardly say anything. The more conscious and sincere you choose your words, the more power they get. Also pay attention to your inner monologue and free it from negativity.

2. DO NOT TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY

No matter what happens in your life, whether your wife leaves you, you lose your job or the cashier is unfriendly to you: do not take it personally. The things that manifest around you do not do that to annoy you. On the contrary. Life is the greatest teacher. When things happen, they are unpleasant at first – they offer you the best chance to learn. For the rest, things also manifest because other people are in the learning process. Maybe your wife leaves you too, because she has to take this step to learn something important. You never know other peoples journey. 3. DO NOT SUSPECT Our ego is very good at making premature, false and unflattering conclusions. Due to negative experiences and lack of self-confidence, we tend to assume unfair intentions. The ego is literally desperate to catch the other in the act of committing an unfair act in order to condemn it (to exalt itself and to create drama). The third promise says, stop imputing things to people. Stay calm. The world (and the people) are better than it seems.

3. DO NOT ASSUME

Our ego is very good at making premature, false and unflattering conclusions. Due to negative experiences and lack of self-confidence, we tend to assume unfair intentions. The ego is literally desperate to catch the other in the act of committing an unfair act in order to condemn it (to exalt itself and to create drama). The third promise says, stop imputing things to people. Stay calm. The world (and the people) are better than it seems.

4. ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST

Always giving his best sounds clear. But the true art is to understand that every human being (including you) can not always be at his best. Everybody has a bad day or a weak minute. If this is the case, do not grieve too much. Stay with you without devaluing yourself. Life offers you many more ways to continue to give your best. To give your best also means not to judge yourself if you were not quite so “good”. Should that happen, still continue to give your best from the heart.

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